I was meditating 2 or more hours a day. I received my Reiki attunements and I was teaching my children about energy. My medical bills decreased from $6,000/year to $2,000/year within the first 9 months of me beginning my meditation practice. Pretty amazing.
But a few years later I began to wonder — OK, throw tantrums when I was working on what seemed to be the same issues again and again. At that point I was not only developing classes, but I was teaching others how to meditate and how to connect with their own inner wisdom. I was using my Reiki attunements to give energy treatments and Dammit I wanted to know why EVERYTHING wasn’t going my way!?
I went through periods of time where my first statement to the Universe was, “When I’m god…..” and then fill in whatever injustice I felt I was suffering. From, “When I’m god, women will stop ovulating after their last kid is born,” to “When I’m running the Universe kids won’t be mean to one another.”
Ironically enough….we are all god and I am co-managing my corner of the Universe. My silly temper tantrums came from a feeling of entitlement–I call it MY SPIRITUAL EGO.
I went from letting my very human, rather insistent ego run ever facet of my life to developing a spiritual ego that had huge entitlement issues. I’ve come to discover that the Spiritual Ego is not all that uncommon to those of us who embark on our conscious journeys.
So, be kind to yourself when you find yourself asking things like, “why do I work on behalf of the Universe when the benefits plan seems non-existent sometimes?” Remember that life is better than it was and no matter what, the Universe cannot bend it’s rules to accommodate your Ego — spiritual or otherwise.